We received lots of feedback from both the other group and our teacher about our idea. We realised that there was still a lot to work on and we needed to take action on this. On Monday we plan to meet as a group and discuss the way forward but for now I will post my individual responses and ideas to the feedback we received:
1. Confusion as to why we had chosen Miramax due to it's indie and niche output.
However this was mostly an error with wording during our presentation as we did not mean to say niche regarding Miramax or our film.
Film is still an independent film and so Miramax is still an ideal distributor.
2. Main inspiration scenes was missing from the presentation. Kill Bill kitchen scene.
Since Nico was the one who recommended the scene he has been given the job of putting it up.
3.Mentioned revenge in our pitch.
Previously had a storyline where she had been a prostitute and was taking her revenge out on men and this got mixed up with our current plot where she is just a highly skilled assassin.
I think it is best to leave the idea of revenge due to keeping it simple although I do think she needs some kind of motivation for her line of work.
This could be put down a hard life in the past however, so instead of taking revenge on specific individuals, she has been left cold by the whole world and this is her way of dealing with it.
4. There was confusion amongst the group about the titles. We realised we had misunderstood each other on this issue and some wanted superimposed titles while others wanted cutaway's.
I think cutaway's would work.
Would be during the conversation/fight,sound running through them. Quite stylised.
Only superimposed titles would be the locations of London/Hollywood.
5. An earlier idea of the evil guy being a family man with a wife and child had been mostly scrapped and we had the idea of family photo's rather than a morning school run. However this was not made clear in the presentation. Family photo's is still the way forward in my view (however as explained in Point 13, I think the family should be cut.)
6. Our opening sequence treatment was not thorough or clear. "Domestic area" should have been kitchen "mess on the floor" could mean anything etc. We would need to go through this as a group and make sure it made sense.
7. We haven't researched music tracks and this is something we need to do. However the idea is to have quiet, tense, atmospheric music throughout the beginning and conversation. During the fight and phone call there will be no music, however when the title LOTUS comes up the music will resume briefly. This is a vital discussion area however.
8.Concern about me being in both films which might be unmanageable.
If this proves to be the case I could ask people in my A level drama class to help but this might prove difficult in terms of reliability.
Needs to be discussed with the group.
9. Dressing the set is an important factor we need to think about, as at the moment it is rather colourful and cheery.
I would suggest all the blinds being down and everything completely clean so the setting seems quite clinical.
Adding a weapons drawer full of gun and knives seen later in the scene would add to this idea of hidden danger.
Cold greens and whites of the kitchen at the moment are not bad for the mise-en-scene.
Get rid of any signs of family life apart from family photos and make the room quite dark and shadowy through clever use of lighting.
10. More use of theory is needed in our presentation, for example the uses and gratifications our film would bring to audiences, narrative theories for example Tordorov's theory and use of binary opposites,
11. The fact that the assassin needs to cover her tracks was raised and a mask was suggested.
I my opinion character is not as strong with a mask on.
Seeing as the characters know each other I don't think she needs a disguise either but gloves is a good idea and she would take these off after killing him.
Death should not be messy, and she should leave him slumped over the table or something instead of on the floor:too obvious.
The idea is that the death should be as inconspicuous as possible while still being exciting.
12. It was felt that the opening was a bit too TV drama.
New titles ideas as well as dressing the set will seem more like a film opening.
13. The assassins' morality was called into question, as it seems she is evil in the opening sequence.
During the film she turns her morality around. This is feasible due the context of her difficult background.
If one of her victims is able to outwit her and question her motivation she could quite easily go through a change of morality during the film and fall in love with her victim.
Due to her having killed people though, things should not end well for her: she should sacrifice herself to stop her boss.
In terms of the opening this is tricky because the idea is for her to be an antihero but this is hard to convey in the opening sequence without having the audience hate her. What I see in my minds eye is a very low lit room with a close of up of running water the man cleaning his knives while running his finger along the blade. This makes his character seem more edgy. The assassin then speaks from behind him, and they talk before a brief fight and then the kill. She mentions something about him upsetting her boss (this is not specified but I imagine it has something to do with failure to pay for drugs.)This makes both characters seem dodgy and therefore the kill is mysterious and interesting. I believe the family man idea should be scrapped (and therefore maybe the domestic location)because otherwise Lotus is too much of a hate figure rather than an intriguing anti hero.
14. Research into guns lacking.
I would suggest as a group we look at the fake guns we have available to us and research which would be used.
There should be a fake gun to suit our needs available in media supplies but if not we would find out where to buy one.
Needs to be discussed
None of these changes are definite and the final changes will all be posted on the group blog after our group discussion.
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